Mala Mala |🏳️🌈LGBTQIA+ | Full Documentary
Your condoms, honey. -Good luck and watch out for yourself. -Bye. Good luck to you all. Where have you been? -Dear, I got married. -What a bitch! -Is Alex fine? -Yeah, he is with his mom now. -That’s great. Good luck to you all! -Thanks. Be good and enjoy yourself… bye.
Hi there! Which lubricant do you like the most? Give me this one. Gels, condoms, lubricants. -Come on! Give me more condoms. -I have to give some to the others too. -I’ll give you two more. They’ll kill me. -To fuck with ten dudes. Alessandra, come here. You haven’t got any. -How’s everything going? -Chill.
-Looks like you’re in a hole. No money? -Too little. Not what I was expecting. How strange that Sandy isn’t here! -Britney, where was Sandy headed to? -I don’t know. She hasn’t come yet. OK. For me, the moment when I started my gender transition, my physical appearance was very important.
I was a little boy with very distinctive feminine traits. Meaning that I always had long hair. I always had a slim body with a healthy skin. And I didn’t have a toned up body. These are usually the physical traits that tend to define you as a little boy.
When I started the hormone therapy, my skin softened a bit more. My physical appearance began changing. My body began filling up with fat, like in the cheeks and other parts. And, when I decided to get curves, I’d always see myself as a typical Latina. A Latina has curvy hips and big buttocks.
I am very pleased with the body I have. I have worked very hard to maintain it. However, I agree not all women seek the same objective of having a statuesque body. And it’s logical that, since we’re not born like that, we want to show! We want to wear sexy clothes and feel beautiful.
People usually move to other countries when they want breast implants and others. Ecuador, in short, has done wonders in me. I am very proud to say I am Puerto Rican, but I was made in Ecuador. Go back inside! Go back inside! I said, “Go back inside!”
Forever and ever, Amen. I’ll always be a man till the day I die. And, as soon as I give you the signal, you open and close the fans after I pass through them. -Hello! -Hi! -Julio. -What? Who do you think will make the top five in Miss Universe? Venezuela.
-Venezuela is very beautiful, isn’t she? -Yeah. She lost weight and got ready for the pageant, but… I’m not jealous of any woman. In fact, I admire her. She is a goddess. I want to be like her. I used to see those girls in Playboy on the stairs, in those poses…
It was a spectacle to look at these girls! They were so beautiful. I was like, “I want to do porn too!” Either hardcore, threesome… Either with women, men, or transsexuals. I could even do five movies in a week. That’s how I entered into prostitution and I started doing both.
I did well. But, in the porn industry, you can only stay four to five years. Ten years. And a maximum of 15 years. Girls with bigger boobs are entering every day into the industry. Prettier girls are coming too. It’s impossible to make $40,000 as before.
I don’t want to turn 40 and have nothing to support myself. So I have decided that it is time to change. -Hello, everybody. Good evening, Milly. -Good evening and welcome, Ivana. Here we have Ivana Fred, who is transgender. Good evening, Rubén.
The media started to see me as a resource. And whenever they talk about trans people, they count me in. If I realize they want to steer the talk, I always try to make it educative. We make it fair for both sides. They somehow get what they want from me.
In turn, I get something beneficial for me and my community, which is to carry a message. The transgender community is one of the most discriminated in society. Regardless of the place, a person’s rights shall not be violated. And this applies to everybody. Even a street beggar. Their rights must be recognized
-and respected. -I agree. I am a very important resource for the LGBT community. Because I know they lack access to this type of service. I feel very proud when I arrive in my car to where they are and they start shouting excitedly, “Ivana, give me more condoms!”
“Where can we get more condoms?” “Where can we get the HIV testing?” Leaving aside money, this makes me a better person. Because I am part of that community and I know they come from humble roots where a condom is sometimes unaffordable. I want to work hard for a better Puerto Rico.
In the sense that my rights are respected. That I am recognized as a transgender person. And that I can study and work like any other person. That’s because I haven’t seen them yet. Yeah. That was recently, like this past Sunday. They’re partying so I couldn’t. Sure, I’ll call them. OK, my darling.
I don’t allow anyone in Puerto Rico or wherever they come from to tell me that I am transsexual. Because if I have my ID certificate where I’m recognized as a female person, why do you still call me transsexual? What’s that? Sometimes I don’t even know what a transsexual is. And I don’t care!
So you identify yourself as a person who changed sexes? No! I am a heterosexual person. I am a woman. -OK, so that’s your sexual preference. -No. It’s not about that. -My birth certificate is the same as hers. -OK. -The same as any Puerto Rican woman. -OK. How would you identify yourself?
If you identify yourself as a woman because your certificate says so and because you’re currently a female. You have to accept that there was a past that cannot be omitted. That there was a past that doesn’t correspond to transsexuality. -But something known as gender dysphoria. -I agree.
-This hasn’t been talked much. -No, it hasn’t. Neither in Puerto Rico nor in the US or other parts of the world. The difference is that those who are born with gender dysphoria can’t recognize the sex they are born with. They feel, love, sing, laugh and cry as a woman.
With a gender identity that doesn’t match her. And that’s when there is a conflict between body, mind and soul. I’ve met a lot of people saying: “I’m transgender.” “I want to be a woman.” “I’m this and that.” Some have very big boobs. -And big buttocks too. -That doesn’t mean to be a woman!
To be a woman means that you are a woman by heart and soul. And many of those that say they are transsexual… They get stuck halfway once they start aging, getting fat, and losing glow. When they’re no longer the Barbie dolls they aspired to be,
Then transsexualism is fucked up. They’ll say: “I’m not a transsexual.” “I don’t look well, so I’m not a transsexual.” So what is it you were before? A beauty queen or a woman? You have to accept yourself as a woman no matter how you look like.
How would you define a person who hasn’t changed sexes? Who, in fact, considers herself as a woman, and has changed her body with intrusive medical procedures? I have met many of them when they were Barbie dolls. Including people who have appeared in Hollywood films. However, they don’t want to be women.
They want to penetrate the men they have sex with. And I’ve never seen a woman penetrating a man. Unless they use one of these things from Condom World. -A dildo. -Yeah, a dildo! But if you insist that you’re a woman
And that you feel you are a woman, you aspire to be a woman. There’s a difference between feeling like a woman and feeling like a beauty queen. These are two different things. Every cross-dresser wants to be part of RuPaul. That’s by default! Because she is the most famous drag queen in the world.
She is the one with the longest artistic career and the most famous. She even has a wax replica in the New York Wax Museum. Everybody wants to be like RuPaul. No one should be deprived of the chance from auditioning. Who wouldn’t want to make it to RuPaul? That’s the goal of every cross-dresser.
To reach to the mass audience. Do you know how many people watch RuPaul? That’s a huge show. The logo is part of MTV and many others too. Reaching there is a huge accomplishment because you’ll be watched by many people on TV and you’ll become famous. You know, the fucking fame.
It’s not about cross-dressing, wearing a wig and putting on a show. It becomes a profession, you start making big money. Like… $200,000 a year by dressing up like a woman for five minutes. After finishing the show, you go home and take five days off.
Every year, there’s a girl from Puerto Rico in the show. I don’t know why. Perhaps, it’s for ratings or whatever. But, of course, I am not stupid. I’m not going to rely only on the typical: “Puerto Rico is a cute girl!” “Yeah, she is really pretty!” “She can’t speak English.” Whatever.
I go there to compete because I have what it takes to win. And I have what is necessary to kick the ass of other bitches. I come physically prepared and well equipped with clothes, you know. This is not Paris City! This is real. This is haute couture!
Not really, but let’s imagine it is. Good evening! Coming! -Honey! -My dear! The Doll House is where I prepare myself and get dressed-up. I must be honest. There is no better camp than mine. We are bad bitches and motherfuckers.
We are the prettiest and there is no bitch that can come close to us. We always keep our face up and never look down. Let’s see if that’s enough. -Honey… -Nice hair! Great. Look at that… Should I paint my legs with magenta or darker?
Well, I don’t know. I don’t focus so much on looking beautiful. Thank God, Edwin always makes me look beautiful. But that’s not my look. My character is rougher, stronger. I’m a queen, but I prefer to see myself as a diva. Some see me as beautiful, others don’t. Anyway…
For me, fabulous is me. I am an all-around person, always looking perfect from head to toe. Many people say: “You don’t change much. You’re a girl.” Whatever. But it’s not the same thing. And it doesn’t feel the same either. I do change. I feel I’m an artist.
When I’m Queen Bee, I’m an artist who’s going to do her show. Queen Bee and I are not, as it were, very different. I’m not one of those crazy people who say they are two different people. I don’t believe that. -When you cross-dress, it’s still you. -Exactly.
It’s like an alter ego, what you’d like to be as a woman. When I realized it was an alter ego, not a different character, I stopped… I stopped liking it as much as before. But, if it went on like before, it could be emotionally damaging. Because it’s not two people, but one.
Alberic had this serious problem. The thing with female illusions is you keep being yourself. But it is an alter ego. -Eat Marián! -Oh, my gosh! They are gonna give you the Corncob Award. She’ll win the Corncob Award. She is feeling delicious. Samanta, Leishlani, go on! -Leishlani, come on! -I’m mesmerized!
It didn’t come out right. It’s damn hot. It’s really hot today. See what this world is like. It’s so crazy. And they have their fucking awesome pussy. Like there is no… They’re not adding anything, man. They are using your own fucking skin. From there. If I want a dick,
It will have to come from here or from here. That’s damn tricky, man. You’re gonna be a man with many fucking scars. Basically. Just a guy like any other, I don’t know… And if a girl looks at you, all the better. Can I get some sierra too? That’s sierra. That’s fish.
We like strolling around, eating, looking for handicrafts… -Food, cookery. -We don’t like clubbing. -What we like is going around the island. -Strolling around. To the rivers, the valleys, the coast. For lunch… Just hanging around. A grinder! -It’s awesome! -Daddy, give me a discount! -How much is it? -It’s 20.
When I saw him at the gas station, he was wearing shorts. And I thought: “Wow, this man”. I loved him, but I didn’t dare. I saw him from behind and he looked like a bad boy. If I told him something, it’d be: “What the fuck, faggot?” And I’d be like…
So I wanted to call his attention. And he wouldn’t look back or do anything. And I was: “Wow”. When he turned round, I looked at him and… I said, “Damn, that blonde is hot!” That was the first thing I said.
Then, after that first time I saw her, I got to know her little by little. How she has changed. But he was homophobic, he didn’t like to be there with us girls. And he told us unpleasant things. Until he fell. -Done. -Was that in the background? I like transsexuals like my wife.
I like dykes too. I’m bisexual. I’m like that. My family loves me and so does my wife. -Isn’t it true? -Of course. I don’t use a wig to pay my rent, or to make a career out of it. This is my life, this is what I use. This skin will never go.
It’s not like a flower, shedding its petals and growing again. That’s it. I was born like that. Forever and ever. I wanted him to know me first, my life. -Like a friend. -What she did… I didn’t want to hide things from him. No, no, no.
This is the way the government has forced me to live my life. And there is nothing wrong with it. It’s a part of my body I don’t like. What they are looking for is the front bit. He doesn’t like the front bit. So we forget about that part.
No woman will ever have a penis. And men come looking for that. That’s the truth. It is usually done in cars. Don’t forget that… It’s like a quickie. It can’t be long. It’s usually in the car and then we go separate ways.
They all have a different price. But they usually charge for a full act. One hundred dollars. Forty for a boob jerk… One hundred for fucky-fucky. If they want love, kissing, affection… they do that with their partners. If they want a moment of fantasy, something different, they come to us.
No matter how hard you try to pretend, the client always knows that we do it for the money. They think that transsexuals are just sex symbols. They don’t see you as a human being, like any other. They only see you as a sex symbol.
They don’t see what you might offer as a person or your feelings. What they see is a transsexual, only for sexual intercourse. I got used to it. I must be realistic. It’s not what I want them to see. This is reality, my reality. Unfortunately, I can’t change the world.
I can’t just say: “I’m a transsexual, I see myself as a woman, so you have to treat me like a woman.” Unfortunately, it’s not like that. I haven’t finished my transition. It’s not the right time. I want… to have a more stable future.
You won’t have a penis. All the incoming men will want to penetrate a vagina. Do you understand? That’s new. Why did you do it? For everyone to… I’ll do it when I retire. I’ll do it when I’m sure that’s my girl.
And if I don’t, welcome to the world. The man who loves me must accept me. Do you love me? The first thing when they call you a cross-dresser, many people think of prostitution. It’s sad, because one thing doesn’t imply the other necessarily. It was two blow-jobs… That was 40 and 40.
Then, a guy wanted to see my boobs. That was 50. Another one for 80… And… Something like… One or two… Three, I think, for 30. Transsexuals, if they stay in a cave, like bats, and if they only go out at night, dressed up…
The world will not know that we exist, or what our needs are. What I need is work for transsexuals. What I need is a health plan for transsexuals. What I need is housing for transsexuals. I always told Ivana that she was a great spokesperson for transsexuals. But the things she was granted,
As aid for Puerto Rico transsexuals, I didn’t think those were aid, but hypocrisy. They don’t want prostitution in Puerto Rico, but they give you condoms. That’s why we had to unite now and say: “Ivana, how could we spend ten million on leaflets and condoms?” But let’s put on the T-shirts!
-Sit down, honey! -Nathalie… Hey, Nathalie! These pictures have to be posted on Facebook. That’s great. -What time is it? -OK, OK! You have to post that one. Now we must change all the methods. We are going to cover ourselves to talk to the press. With long-sleeve shirts and long trousers.
So that they pay attention to what we say, for them to convey it to the public. No shorts, no fancy dresses, no overflowing tits… I don’t want any of that. Everything covered, from your chin to your feet. They should only see our mouths. That’s what I need.
Those with high heels, step on the carpet. Because you can hear the tapping. OK. Three, two, one… Cue. We’re from the Trans Foundation. -We are from the Foundation… -Wait… She doesn’t know what to say! Wait, let me get comfortable. What a fuss! -We are the Butterflies Trans Foundation. -I’ll say it!
A non-profit organization… -We are Butterflies Trans Foundation… -You’re all saying different things. -I don’t know what… -Exactly, Sandy. That’s what I was saying. OK. You say something. She says something, and he says something. -But you know what to say, right? -We are the Trans Foundation… -Listen, one moment… -I didn’t find…
We don’t want to say something in Spanish and then in English. -We are Butterflies Trans Foundation. -OK. A non-profit organization. -Have you heard? -About what? The march next May 17. As a gay man, I won’t support it. I think the march is for transsexuals.
No, darling. It’s for the whole LGBTT community in general. We will demand our rights. You are all welcome. Bring your relatives. There will be lots of surprises. MARCH FOR YOUR RIGHTS MAY 17, 2013. 5 P.M. OUTSIDE THE CAPITOL Many of us… don’t dare to appear…
In a public forum, for fear of being identified as a transsexual in the street. I respect that, but I think it’s wrong, for people will notice if you’re a transsexual, anyway. Some of them say they can’t get a job and have to go into prostitution,
Because they are turned down. But if you don’t put up a fight, you won’t achieve anything. It’s one thing to say: “I’m a transsexual, give me this and that.” And another is subtly saying: “I want my rights to be recognized.” I’m a contributing citizen in this country. I need to be respected.
You’ll be heard and they can see you’re not there just for the sake of fighting, but to claim your rights, which is the important thing. When it’s your turn to talk, don’t read it like a parrot. Speak calmly so that they understand you.
When I asked you to read last night, you read it like a letter. Read slowly. I, Lisa Marie Rodríguez Rodríguez… I repeat, it’s no good for anyone. It only privileges the LGBTT community. In ninth place, that project goes against divine designs. It acknowledges and protects homosexuality as normal behavior.
Homosexuality is not a normal behavior, as prostitution isn’t normal either. I’ll ask this, this and that. They don’t care about our stories. -What matters is inequality. -That’s why. In our case, the only thing we can tell is our stories. What you have to express is the pain you’ve suffered. It’s the right time.
It’s the right time because great nations have laid the foundation stone. My name is Ivana Fred. I represent the Butterflies Trans Foundation. -My name is Denise Rivera… -Move the microphone, please. My name is Denise Rivera and I represent the Trans Foundation. Thank you. It is important for us to establish that…
In contrast to other distinguished speakers, we’re not here to offer scientific or legal data, or to give information on which we are not experts. We are here to tell our stories and life experiences as transsexual women, something we are familiar with. How I could go to a school or a college to study,
So that when I was in front of an employer, I was not seen simply as a transsexual, but as a professional transsexual person who’s looking for a job. That we are here with the intention of victimizing ourselves. We are a part of the population that needs
A decent life, like any other human being. This is the most important thing. Gender dysphoria is one of the most… controversial and poorly understood conditions in the world. People speak about being homosexual, transsexual, bisexual… but few people know what gender dysphoria is. It’s the main, essential element
That makes a person change from male to female or from female to male, choosing to be assigned medically a different sex, with the backing of medicine. Nowadays, I’ve decided to write a book to explain all the things a person goes through when they suffer from gender dysphoria.
I did it to educate, to illustrate, to inform and to act as a reference point for everything that was part of my own experience. That condition can be arranged through a sex re-assignation operation. Since the mind cannot be operated, they choose to give you a new sex,
Or a gender identity that suits your thinking. I’m still learning from the nice things a woman might have. Like putting less makeup on, or trying to avoid looking like a caricature or an imitation of a woman. I try to copy, to internalize those things that might take me fully to a woman’s world.
I’ve always wanted to be a cross-dresser. And this has changed. Totally. I only wanted to be a cross-dresser. Without realizing that I could also be a psychologist, a journalist, an actor… These are things I studied. I lived in a kind of bubble, in a fantasy world. I thought Zahara Montiere was a person
That really existed. I went as far as having surgery to improve my appearance and to look more like a real woman. Like the cheek bones, upper lip, chin, buttocks and hips. I had surgery in my cheeks three times. The third time, I went crying to Rochelle’s house,
Because my face was swollen. I couldn’t believe it. I looked like an alien. I woke up when I was 30 or 35, and then… I said, wait, what am I doing with my life? Just dressing up like a woman. It’s not worth it. It really isn’t worth it.
…now, in Puerto Rico, to get testosterone. There is no T. Period. I have to leave fucking Puerto Rico. That’s quite heavy, man. Without categorizing… It’s not a whim! I didn’t ask to be this way. I simply grew up like this. I can do nothing about it.
It’s like… two days in a row and one off. Two more days and one off. We feel awesome because… it’s like finally… someone from our group will jump outside. Joining something as important as RuPaul. I’m there, like others. Bebo is there. And so are Queen Bee and Alberic. We’re all there.
After April, some others will come, so… There is an open bridge now. All the dreams we’ve always had will come true big time, so… -I think… -What? -The underpants are showing… -I think it is… -There, yes. -You have to stick it in there. You have to stick it at the back.
-Exactly. -Right there, yes. Yes, honey. You look so sensual. If you could play your music… It’s not this one. At first, there was elation, as he wanted to know what he had to take, what the process was, etc. But then I felt gratitude for who April was and what she’ll be doing now.
It was a gift to Puerto Rico, which she will give to the world now. We’re anxious for the show to start. I’m here folding her clothes for the show. We were all excited. And we still are excited. More, more, more! And the float goes there.
-Did you buy too much stuff? -Put in in there. -Nothing left out, right? -These shirts. -We have to finish. -You need to pack those nails. We have to put the nails in. Zaira said they don’t fit in there. Since I was five, I know where I’m going.
When I was asked what I wanted to be as an adult, I said to myself ironically police officer, but… what I really meant was “a woman”. My mom caught me in the square wearing her clothes. With my long hair, but wearing her clothes. I was around 12 then. We arrived home,
And she thrashed me. I’ll never forget it. She thrashed me and said: “Do you want to be a woman? You’ll be a woman, then.” She thrashed me. I had a pageboy hair style. She shaved it completely, to the point of scalping me. Then I started wearing a flat-top.
When she did this to me, she saw the rage… the sadness and the force of my crying, with every bit of hair she cut… When she saw me in the mirror, she noticed she had hurt me deeply. From that moment, things went differently. I started taking hormones behind her back
And she noticed I was changing. Since then, she understood that there was no going back. and that I knew where I was going and what I wanted. Since then, things changed. She accepted me totally. We love to come to this show and give some tips to the girls,
But we need to keep fighting for our rights out on the streets. I’ll leave you with Ivana. A round of applause for her. It’s very important to make ourselves heard. We are here today having fun, drinking, toasting and jumping,
But make some time to claim our rights. So come here tomorrow at 4 p.m. There will be free transportation for all those who want to go to the march. For those who need transportation, at 4 p.m., there will be a bus parked in front of this club waiting for you.
We hope to have your support and all the relatives you can bring will be welcome. A round of applause for Ivana. Thanks for the information. We’ll continue supporting this cause and we’re ready for the next girl now. A big round of applause, which she deserves, for Miss April Carrión!
Luisa, I want to see you at the march. -I’m going. -Really? -When and where do we pick you up? -At home. I won’t pick you from your home. We’ll be at 5 p.m. in front of Scandalo, the club. We ask the Lord to help us and to give us peace
When we are at the march. We ask him to give us the ability to express clearly the message we want to convey. -Good! -That’s brave! EQUALITY I go to job interviews. They always say they’ll call me, but never do. -And you think the reason is… -That I’m transsexual.
Personally, I want to find a job, and have a chance to work with my chosen identity, not as they want me to be. If I feel I’m a woman, they have to treat me as such. That’s what my education entitles me to. For the first time, transsexuals, transgender people are here,
Because we are part of you! We are fighting for a law allowing us to get jobs with our chosen identities. It’s the time to unite, to work together, as a community. We are all one. We’ll stop getting marginalized. Not all of us are prostitutes.
If we are in the streets, that’s because the government won’t let us work! You don’t know how beautiful you all look tonight. You fill our city every day with love, tolerance, and understanding. You achieve the unity of people with different ideologies, from all the parties, from all parts of Puerto Rico
In one single mission. I want you to say it with me, wholeheartedly, so that the whole Puerto Rico can hear us: We are all equal. Say it with me: We are all equal. We are all equal! We are equal! -I want one. With mine. -Here.
A question: why don’t you leave the cameras and stand behind us? -Yes, and we can all be in the picture. -Yes. I’m proud of being a transsexual, rather than being ashamed, no matter what society at large thinks. Why am I saying this? Because…
That’s how I felt and experienced it. I came out publicly since 2003. Over 10 years now. And I was never ashamed to appear on a TV show or any other public forum, to talk about my life for the purpose of educating a country. I think I’ve achieved that.
Many people changed their views on this. Perhaps things haven’t changed at the speed I’d like to see, but we did achieve something. We came to celebrate my first day at work. I start working in public housing, a government department. We’re celebrating because one more door is open for our transsexual community.
I start tomorrow. Who’s calling? Who? You queer! Why didn’t you come? Seriously? Why didn’t you call me? Listen, I have more news for you. I’ve started working. In housing. I’m off to sign the contract now. Yes, I’m really pleased. FORGING A NEW BEGINNING THE END
The critically acclaimed MALA MALA explores the intimate moments, performances, friendships and activism of trans identifying people, drag queens and others who defy typical gender identities in Puerto Rico. The film features Ivana, an activist; Soraya, an older sex-change pioneer; Sandy, a prostitute looking to make a change; and Samantha and Paxx, both of whom struggle with the quality of medical resources available to assist in their transition. Hailed as “Sensitive and thoughtful” by the NEW YORK TIMES and winner of the audience award for documentary film at the Tribeca Film Festival, MALA MALA affirms that the quest to find oneself can be both difficult and beautiful.
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A film by Antonio Santini, Dan Sickles (2015)